really?!

why is it so hard to write? it takes so much out of me. 

if only it was not so difficult...

i'm happier when i try to create something else. 

i don't need to be forced by a deadline to do it. 

DIY: my first bracelet

finally i used the beads i bought in Wellmanson's Quiapo last Friday!

(to know more about where to buy beads, etc. click here)

Eights A Bracelet!

for this project i used:

20 (or is it 22?) gauge copper wire

no. 03 copper wire (very thin wire)

Swarovski

different beads

i have no system of doing things. i like winging it! even looking at patterns 

or reading and watching instructions on Youtube bore me after a while. 

if i rely on them, i would get bored and maybe not finish my project. 

just as it is when you're writing a script, 

if you think of what the critics will say, stop writing because otherwise

 you'll just end up staring at your computer, not able to write anything. 

in my case, the only one i think of when i write is the audience. 

will they watch it?  will it interest them?

 that's my only desire because after all, 

would you want to tell a story in an empty theater?  

anyway back to my handmade jewelry!

this is my rose rings! 

i plan to make more because i just love it.

but next time, i want to do it using sterling silver wire. 

my fingers hurt but i'm going to sleep happy :)

on writing

while battling with my deadline, i'm also battling with my desire to do other things aside from writing.

like watch River Monster now on Discovery on piranha!

Jeremy Wade with a giant piranha. i like the guy

look online for things i can buy in Australia so Mylene can take it home with her next week.

or look at Etsy and Pinterest for nice stuff!

i want that blouse!

or just wonder where our package from Amazon is right now! tunganga lang sana.

STOP! 2 MORE DAYS! GAPANG KUNG GAPANG!

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

ayoko magsulat! gusto ko gumawa ng DIY projects! maloloka na ko!

something new in my life

hay grabe. wala akong magawa.
tamad na ko manood ng Crime & Investigation, Nat Geo o Discovery Channel.
sawa na rin akong maglaro ng Zombie Farm, Scrabble, Poker o kahit mag-Looklet.
i need to do something worthwhile. i want meaning. i need a goal.

---
tama bang magdoubt sa career na 10 years mo na ginagawa?
writer ba talaga ko?
bakit nung pinangalanan ko 'tong blog na 'to hindi man lang pumasok sa isip ko na pangalanan itong eat.write.travel? kanina habang nasa CR ako tsaka ko lang naisip na nawala yun. wala na ba talaga kong passion to write?

i have stories i want to tell. pero walang kagaya ng Magnifico na talagang parang binuntis ko at inanak at iniluwal. tamad lang ba talaga ko o hindi ako inspired?

may kakilala ko na same birthday ko na magaling at sikat na painter.
nung papasok ako ng college gusto ko yung uniform ng Fine Arts na pants at blouse na parang pang-Dunkin' Donut crew. parang sign yun kasi later on magshi-shift sana ko sa Fine Arts pero kelangan ko umulit ng 1 year kaya di ko na ginawa.

kung tinuloy ko kaya, magaling kaya akong painter ngayon? o mediocre lang? sa writing din kaya ang bagsak ko?

i'll never know the answer.

ang magagawa ko na lang ngayon, may gawin! something! i need to join a class, learn something new. discover a new passion...